Hey, guys? I'm sorry, but... I've gotta leave. My parents can't afford to keep me here anymore, and I've gotta go back home. I'm really sorry to everyone here, but I wanna say a few specific goodbyes...

( To Nester )
( To Lucas )

( To Otacon )

( To Lip )

( To Jeff Angel )

( To Knuckles )

( To Smee )

To everyone else, thanks for all the memories. See you around!

Hey, Nester?  I finally forgive you.

Hey Smee?  I found your panties.  You wanna come get them back?  

Rowr...

[Private to self]
This is ridiculous...  I haven't spoken to her in weeks...  I'm going crazy wondering what she's thinking...  I can't take this anymore!  I have to talk to her.  Even if she says she doesn't want to see me anymore, I have to get it over with.

[Private to Smee]
Smee, we need to talk.  Right now.

Fuck you, Nester.

Seriously, fuck you Nester.

Smee still isn't speaking to me...  I don't want to talk about it.

Why can't I ever have a relationship that just works?

Hey guys, I'm back from camp!  Oh man, we had a great time!  I got to see all my old buddies again, we laughed, we played, we had a great time!  We went out for sundaes like every day after practice!

So how're you guys all doing?

Hey Lucas, I hope you don't mind, I brought some of my stuff from back home to put up on my side of the room.  So don't mind those two big boxes by my bed!

Sorry to bail on you guys like this, particularly you Smee, but something came up.  Back home, my home team is starting up training camp, and they need me to help train pitchers.  I promise I'll be back as soon as I can!

[Private to Smee]
Feel free to send me some of your pictures while I'm gone!  I'd love to see them!

[Private to Nester]
Now when you're out with Lip, remember: No means No, and use protection.

Mike was frustrated with Jeff Angel.  He had asked Smee out, probably just to piss him off.  In fact, he was out with her right now, being that smug, arrogant son of a bitch he was.  First he could never just leave him and Nester alone, and now he was trying to steal Mike's girlfriend?  

Mike wasn't going to stand for that.

He looked at the clock.  He had been planning this for so long, and now he was getting his chance.  Jeff and Smee were at the restaurant now, probably just sitting down to dinner.  Perfect.  Mike snuck out of his room, quietly tiptoeing down the hall towards Jeff Angel's room.  Jeff's roomie was out now, thankfully; he didn't need any witnesses.  He tried the doorknob.  Locked.  No problem.  Mike lifted his hand and pointed a finger at the knob.  He was getting a bit better with his limited telekinetic abilities.  Just a bit, and...  Bingo, the lock clicked.  Mike grinned to himself as he turned the knob and let himself in, quietly closing the door after him. 

He looked around the room.  He could immediately tell which side belonged to Jeff Angel; it was the neatest one.  It also had detective books on the nighttable.  Okay, how was he going to get back at--

Wait, detective novels?

Mike picked up the small stack of books next to Jeff's bed.  These weren't like any detective books he had ever seen.  They were more like... harlequin romance novels?  Seriously?  Those covers...  Was that a half-naked Sherlock Holmes lookalike on one?!  What the hell was Jeff into?!

Well, considering how many of them there were, this would be perfect for his revenge.  He picked up the stack of books and snuck out of the room, making sure to lock the door behind him on the way out.  From there, he hid the books in his jacket pockets and left the boys dorms, heading towards the teachers' dorms.  He knew that Mr. Hyde was someone Jeff had history with.  Best place to plant the evidence then. 

When he reached Kyle's dorm, Mike knocked softly.  Seems he wasn't there.  Oh well, time to let himself in again.  Picking the lock one more time, Mike snuck inside.  Wow, the teachers had nicer dorms than they did.  No time to think about that now.  He had a job to do. 

He quietly crept through the room, making sure not to disturb anything, and crept into Kyle's bathroom.  He lifted the seat of the toilet, picked the books out of his pockets, and dropped them in, one by one.  Payback time, Jeff.

His childish vengence complete, Mike snuck out of the room, locked it after him, and wandered down the hall innocently.  Even if he got caught, it was totally worth it.

I got back from spending father's day back in Seattle.  The old man and I went to a baseball game!  It was great!

[Private to self; unhackable]
Jeff Angel's gotta know about me and Smee, and he's still asking her out.  That's just how he works.  I could take it when he was just making fun of me and Nester, but now he's just asking for trouble.  I've gotta find some way to pay him back for this...

*Lucas will find on his bed a gift from Mike.  It's a baseball glove, and a promise to teach him to play.*

Prom was a lot of fun!  I got to dance with a few people at least, so I'm happy!  Would've liked to get around a bit more, but the dances I got were quality.  And I didn't get roped into Nester's schemes, which is always a plus.

I've been wondering, just how many baseball fans/players do we have in this place?

*Mike spent all morning washing the mascara off his face, thank you.*

NESTER!

You had something to do with this, didn't you?

Nester.

I hate you so much right now.

Well, my parents were relieved I made it through okay.  They also insisted I quote, "never get involved in a war again".  We'll just have to wait and see how many more alien invaders come our way!

So how's everyone hanging?  Sucks how much of the city was lost in the attack, but if there's one thing we do well over here it's rebound from adversity!  Things'll be back to normal before we know it!

Hello?  Hal?

I've done a lot of things in my short life.  Fighting in a war isn't one of them.  But...  I'm willing to do whatever needs to be done.

I'm gonna put in a call to Dr. J.  Maybe he can send me some stuff to help.  Maybe Hal knows something that could help too...  Probably not, since he's just one of Dr. J's grad students.  But he is pretty smart, maybe he can come up with something.  I should get in touch with him too while I'm at it.

((Mike doesn't really know that Otacon is at SBG already))

This thing just shot me in the butt and flew past my head!  What the hell was that?!

((First poster is Mike's crush!))

You know what our gang needs? Cool shades.  So let's hit the mall together and get us some!  Nobody's gonna take us seriously unless we've got cool shades.

That's right, Mike Jones is all man once again!

Totally not eating at the cafeteria again.

Okay, whoever did this, IT ISN'T FUNNY ANYMORE.

Though this IS bringing back some memories.